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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25941808">Heavenly</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunlightpink/pseuds/Sunlightpink'>Sunlightpink</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), Choking, Daddy Kink, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Face Slapping, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Light BDSM, Love Confessions, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Praise Kink, Rough Sex, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, Spanking, Tags May Change</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:27:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,870</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25941808</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunlightpink/pseuds/Sunlightpink</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When the newest member of the BAU joins the team, they are shocked to find out just how intelligent and mysterious Doctor Celeste Macchia really is. Has Reid really met his match? Will he be able to swallow his pride and potentially find someone on his wavelength? or will he take it as a a challenge and fight back?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This is my first attempt at a fic, I have lots of ideas planned for upcoming chapters. There may be some inaccuracies in terms of Mathematics equations and so forth but take this with a pinch of salt as it is just to build up the storyline.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Spencer Reid &amp; Reader, Spencer Reid/Original Female Character(s), Spencer Reid/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>34</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Genius</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>We meet the people we are supposed to when the time is just right - Alyson Noel</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-------------------------------------------</p><p> </p><p>"So, who's the new chick in Hotch's Office?" Morgan quizzed as Garcia, Rossi and JJ stood in the Bullpen ogling Hotch's closed blinds, all sipping their coffee tentatively.</p><p>"Hotch talked to Emily" Rossi spoke back "she just doesn't want to come back"</p><p>"Why? She loves us" Penelope pleaded from besides Morgan's tall frame.</p><p>"For what it's worth, Hotch is interviewing someone we've never met before, we'll have a fresh new face, which could be interesting"</p><p>"He is? How many candidates is that now?" JJ quizzed as she took a gentle sip from her coffee.</p><p>"This one makes lucky number 10".</p><p>"What? See this is what happens when I don't sleep. I miss things, who is this person? Are they nice?" Penelope cried. "Why is that the first question I always ask?" and the team chuckled together for a moment.</p><p>"How'd you know the person in Hotch's office is a woman? Have you been snooping?" JJ smirked at Morgan rerouting the conversation to his earlier question.</p><p>"Maybe. I walked past before and heard them talking, sounded pretty feminine to me" he laughed.</p><p>The elevator door dinged and Reid stepped out clutching his signature brown bag, taking long gentle strides towards the team, his fluffy brown curls bouncing as he walked.</p><p>"Hey, guys" he beamed "what's going on?" Reid looked up towards Hotch's office and noticed the blinds were closed. "is he interviewing another candidate?"</p><p>"Looks so, pretty boy, from what I heard when I walked past earlier the lucky 10th candidate is a she, so don't be getting any ideas Doctor" Morgan playfully pushed Reid's shoulders.</p><p>Reid looked confused as he always does when a joke goes way over his head, he darted his eyes across the rest of the team looking for the answer.</p><p>"It's a joke!" replied Morgan, and Reid let out a small sigh of relief.</p><p>"oh yeah...I knew that" he said as he scratched the back of his neck nervously and then ran his hand through his hair, slicking back his curls.</p><p>Rossi began to pull out his phone, "You know, I'm sure Hotch gave me her name a few days ago, about someone he was quite stoked on"</p><p>"Gimme gimme gimme" Penelope sat down at a random desk next to the team and opened her laptop, her bracelets and charms slapping into the keyboard. "Give me a name so I can quickly snoop, I want to see if she's nice!"</p><p>"Okay okay! Here, I found it, Doctor Celeste Macchia"</p><p>Reid's eyes perked up at the word Doctor. Celeste Macchia. He repeated to himself, imagining the name rolling off his tongue, it was unique and beautiful, he could only hope her mind was as unique and beautiful too. </p><p>"You hear that pretty boy? looks like you're not the only Doctor in the building".<br/>
Reid rolled his eyes at the comment, pretending he wasn't suddenly interested.</p><p>A few more clicks of the keyboard and then "ah! got it... let's see" she trailed off "Oh".</p><p>"What" JJ interjected</p><p>"oh. oh wow" she started laughing, closing her laptop as the rest of the gang tried to clamber behind her to see.</p><p>"Garcia! what is it?"</p><p>"I think Reid may have just met his match"</p><p>Reid perked up again, this time looking like a helpless little Meerkat.</p><p>"What do you mean?" his brows furrowed.</p><p>"Shh Shh" she said as she swatted her hand "here he comes now. You'll see"</p><p>Hotch stepped out of his office, as the door was open they could see a little figure of someone sat in a chair, filling out some forms.</p><p>Hotch looked towards the Bullpen and signalled towards the conference room, the team followed. </p><p> </p><p>---------------------------------</p><p>Once the team had settled around the table, Hotch stood up "everyone" he announced "I'd like to introduce you to the newest member of our team, Doctor Celeste Macchia" his eyes shifted to the entrance door.</p><p>Everyone turned to face the girl, Morgan swiftly kicked Reid under the table signalling him to turn around. Reid's eyes widened, his mouth slightly ajar in shock.</p><p>'she's mesmerising' he thought to himself. </p><p>the rest of the team were taking her in, but not in the way Reid was.</p><p>Morgan laughed "all right pretty boy, keep it together" Reid quickly turned back around flustered as the others delighted in his face turning a light tomato colour.</p><p>"Macchia, this is SSA's Derek Morgan" Hotch began as he guided her over to the team, who all began to stand up in order to greet her properly. "These are SSA's JJ and David Rossi, our tech analyst Penelope Garcia, and this is Doctor Spencer Reid"</p><p>Penelope stood up from her computer and launched herself at Celeste, giving her a big hug. "I'm sorry, I'm quite the avid hugger, but I can tell we're going to be great friends!"</p><p>Reid stood up to shake her hand, for a moment the team were shocked and confused, Reid never wanted to shake hands but for Celeste he wanted to make an exception. She stepped back "actually I don't shake hands, I'm sorry. Germs, you know?"</p><p>"yeah..." he replied slightly taken aback "safer to kiss really".</p><p>"Exactly!"</p><p>Celeste stood out like a sore thumb around the others. She was completely different in style, but similar to Penelope in the fact that she was bright and wore her individuality; she didn't blend in that's for sure.</p><p>She had bright blue medium length hair with a slight side fringe that was tucked behind her pierced ears. Her perfect hourglass figure was accentuated by the tight black jeans she had on that hugged her waist. A bright yellow flowy blouse trickled delicately over her pale skin. An over sized grey cardigan draped over her, her tiny feet were enveloped in a hug by some plain white converse.</p><p>Reid continued to assess her appearance as she sat down and pulled a chair up next to him.</p><p>As he got a closer look, he noticed she had piercings. She had a cute button nose adorned with small nostril studs on each side. With her hair tucked behind her ear, he noticed she had quite a lot of ear jewellery, she had cute little studs running up the side of her ear and two situated in her rook and tragus.</p><p>"Macchia here joins us from the academy where she graduated top of her class and then some" Hotch began "in fact she has the highest score we've ever seen".</p><p>"Apart from lover boy over here" Morgan nudged Reid for the second time today but Reid actually getting the joke this time laughed back and slapped Morgan's arm.</p><p>Morgan feigned hurt and Hotch crossed his arms and smirked "that's the thing" he began "her scores were actually higher than Reid's quite significantly so. Her scores in the physical drills were also the highest we've seen, but we all know Reid isn't exactly the resident genius when it comes to running or any sort of physical activity"</p><p>"Wait, what" Reid did a double take and looked at the girl who was twiddling her pen, looking down at the desk.</p><p>JJ continued "if you don't mind me asking, how old are you? It's just you seem awfully young!"</p><p>"I'm 21 and don't worry I don't mind at all! I get that question a lot". Her smile was infectious.</p><p>"21?! How on Earth did you manage that?"</p><p>"I graduated high school at 10 years of age, so I had a bit of a head start, then I finished college at 12 and then went on to Harvard to get PhD's in Psychology, Philosophy, and Sociology and then the BAU heard about me and requested that I join".</p><p>"Wait, so we head hunted you?" interjected Morgan.</p><p>"uh huh" she nodded "there's a specific reason why, but I hate talking about it, every time people find out they always ask me a million and one questions".</p><p>"Garcia" interjected Hotch trying to give Celeste some relief so she didn't get pressed further on the matter.</p><p>"Right, yep" she clicked her remote and proceeded to hand out case files.</p><p>"Last week, our entire security network was breached and we were sent into blackout".</p><p>"We believe the unsub, may have been hacking the system to look into the witness protection files of his next victims." Hotch carried on "but we don't know who."</p><p>"and that my furry little friends is the $64,000 question. It'll pay you $64,000 if you can answer it. His encryption algorithms are beyond the beyond the beyond".</p><p>"we're not going to find him though his computer expertise" added Rossi "Certainly not now, we need to figure out why he'd take the risk to hack us".</p><p>"It looks like he's looking for every kid who's made an accusation. One of them is in witness protection and he saved him for last because if he kills that target first, you'd be on to him immediately," Celeste pipped up. </p><p>"did you just read the case file that quickly"</p><p>"yup" she smiled</p><p>"huh" Reid said as he flicked through the piles of code that Penelope printed off earlier that week.</p><p>"What? You see something" said Morgan.</p><p>"Encryption is a highly specialised skill set"</p><p>Celeste watched on as Reid began to ramble. She couldn't help but notice how tall and attractive he was, his slender but muscled frame fitting into his shirt, and his hair, oh god his hair she thought. His hair was a beautiful shade of hazel, short at the sides and curly and longer on the top, it was a choppy mess, like he had just woken up. Celeste couldn't help but ogle him as he continued on his ramble.</p><p>"but it's fundamentally a mathematical process, which means it's a human process but sometimes your technique can reveal where you learned it... I think I knew where he learned how to do this"</p><p>"Where?"</p><p>"Havard"</p><p>Celeste looked up from studying the case files as she heard the name.</p><p>Reid looked at her reaction and continued "which oddly enough isn't known for it's advanced math program, but it is known for one particular class. When you're good at math, you're good enough to get into Harvard, you take a math class called Math 15"</p><p>Celeste sat up in her seat, looking more and more uncomfortable.</p><p>"When you're better than that, you take Math 25. But when you're the best, the absolute best you take Math 55; Honours Advanced calculus and linear algebra. Graduates are immediately employed by the US government because they're too dangerous to work anywhere else."</p><p>Celeste interjected "It's not called Honours advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra anymore"</p><p>Reid furrowed his brows again staring at her intently, the whole team turned to face her.</p><p>"Macchia, you don't have to -" hotch knew she was uncomfortable with the situation having only just met them literal moments ago.</p><p>"No, it's okay, they were going to find out eventually, weren't they? That's the reason I was approached by the FBI. I graduated in Honours Abstract Algebra, Math 55a and Honours Real and Complex Analysis, Math 55b. The NSA approached me multiple times and I refused. When the FBI heard that I refused to work for the NSA they contacted me and I agreed on one condition, that I could join the BAU".</p><p>"You're joking right? We just so happen to mention Math 55 and you somehow manage to have a qualification in it?" Spencer looked slightly annoyed and sceptical although intrigued. Maybe he was testing her ? Testing her intelligence and ability.</p><p>"What you don't believe me ?"</p><p>"Not really no"</p><p>"Fine." She stood up in a huff immediately "I'll show you" Celeste yanked the whiteboard pen from his hands and marched angrily towards the white board.</p><p>"Do you know Binomial Therom and Combinatorial Proofs?"</p><p>"Vaguely. Binomial Therom is the statement that for any positive integer n, the nth power of the sum of two numbers a and b may be expressed as the sum of n + 1 terms of the form".</p><p>"Okay good" she gave him a warming smile, she wasn't expecting him to actually know. He's smart and handsome? she thought. She began to stand on her top toes writing a question on the board as she continued speaking "A combinatorial identity is proven by counting the number of elements of some carefully chosen set in two different ways to obtain the different expressions in the identity"</p><p>"So, tell me Doctor, how does one answer this question"</p><p>Reid scanned the board to read the words: Give combinatorial proof that (2n n) = 2(n 2) +n2.</p><p>"I have no idea what the hell you two are saying , you're talking Greek to me" Morgan pipped in as the rest of the team were still silent.</p><p>"I-I-I Urm. I don't know" everyone gasped slightly mouths ajar.</p><p>"Pretty boy doesn't know something for once? That's shocking"</p><p>"I Urm I don't know but I could know, I mean I'd need time to study it and work it out"</p><p>"Do you want to know the answer?" Celeste pleaded. She had decided early on that she like Reid. He was smart, handsome and well put together, but she wanted to prove a point to anyone that doubted her skills and intelligence. She only hoped that Reid understood that too.</p><p>Reid nodded.</p><p>" well we want to count the number of ways choosing two things from a set with 2n objects" she began to scribble numbers at high speed on the whiteboard "so let's split up our set of 2n objects into groups of size n. Call them groups 1 and 2. Now to choose two elements of our original big set we can do this in terms of the smaller sets in the following ways."</p><p>Moving to the lower end of the board as she was quickly running out of room she continued to glide her pen across the board, her blue locks bouncing slightly with each dab of the pen on the board.<br/>
"1. Choose two elements from group 1 (n 2) ways.<br/>
2. Choose two elements from group 2 ( n 2 ) ways.<br/>
3. Choose one element from each group n2 ways. Thus (2n n ) = 2 (n 2)+ n2."</p><p>She turned back around to see the team looking on both confused, shocked, and slightly smug and amused that Reid had been challenged intellectually and had probably taken a blow to his ego.</p><p>"I'm sorry. I tend to ramble. Especially when someone challenges me" </p><p>Rossi was the first to break the silence as Reid was still flicking his eyes between studying the board and studying Celeste. "Okay, I'll be the one to say it and break the silence, are you some kind of super genius like wonder boy here?" moving his head in a fashion that pointed towards Reid. </p><p>"not really" Celeste said sheepishly staring at the floor as she nervously scratched the back of her neck.</p><p>"This is what I was laughing at before" Penelope added "She is a super genius.. her IQ is 220"</p><p>Reid couldn't stop staring at Celeste now, he was blown a back by the whole situation. She had stolen the air right out of his lungs.</p><p>"You've got to be fucking kidding me" Rossi responded</p><p>"Wait, is that even possible?" said Morgan</p><p>"S-s-statistically speaking it's very unlikely" Reid said trying to show he wasn't insanely attracted to her right now, more so than ever. And, even if he didn't like to admit it, a little bit challenged. </p><p>"Oh here we go" Morgan groaned, but before Reid could carry on, Celeste interrupted them both.</p><p>"The probability of my IQ being 200 is 1 in 76, 429,666,479. Given there are 7 billion people on Earth today give or take, and only 108 billion people have ever lived on Earth in Earth's entire history, it is highly unlikely as there have only ever been a handful of people with an IQ of 200 or more. Unless I'm John Von Neumann risen from the dead - or perhaps Newton, Euler, Gass, Milton, Geothe, Da Vinic and Shakespeare all rolled into one I'd say its doubtful. Plus IQ tests are not as accurate as you think they may be"</p><p>"What do you mean?" JJ replied</p><p>"On standard IQ tests, standard deviations of 15 and 18, an IQ of 200 would mean I would be + 6.67 s.d or +6.25 s.d. Unfortunately, such tests don't actually go up to that level. The Weschler, WAIS, can be extrapolated to around 190, the Cattell Culture Fair measures to 183."</p><p>"Oh good god, there's two of them" Rossi said as he buried his head in his hands.</p><p>As Reid and the team were still trying to comprehend who this Celeste was and where she came from Penelope approached Hotch, "sir, Macchia's statement about the NSA..that would make a lot of sense though. Only someone from the NSA could be capable of doing this"</p><p>Hotch immediately took out his phone and exited the room "This is agent Hotchner for Mr Axelrod. No I wont hold. Tell him he has 20 minutes to meet me" and then an abrupt beep, hotch continued walking down the hallway, a man on a mission.</p><p> </p><p>-------------------------------------------</p><p>It is not that I am mad it is only that my head is different from yours. - Diogenes of Sinope</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Checkmate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Chapter warnings: brief mentions of child abuse, implications of childhood trauma, night terrors, violence, blood.<br/>.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take,  but by the moments that take our breath away.  - Maya Angelou</p><p>——————————————————-</p><p> </p><p>It had been a couple of weeks since Hotch's traumatic ordeal with Mr Scratch.</p><p>Hotch returned to the office a few days ago, slowly but surely recovering from his horrifying experience. He was definitely a changed man but , with all the heartbreak he had been through in his life, he knew he'd be able to push past it eventually.</p><p>Celeste had been keeping to herself, since joining the stress of being in a new area and not being used to some of the horrors she was seeing on the job her old nightmares were coming back pretty much every night, the last two nights she hadn't slept at all and she was beginning to feel the want to sleep creep up on her slowly but surely.</p><p>"Hey, Celeste?" Reid approached her from behind whilst she sat at her desk with her head in her hands, she jumped up startled. "Sorry I didn't mean to startle you! I thought you could use a coffee so I got you this" Reid placed the cup down on the table, Celeste watched in awe at the way his strong veiny hands were rapped around the cup right before her eyes.</p><p>Reid noticed her staring and took his hand away and coughed to try to dissipate the tension. "Are you okay?"</p><p>Whilst she had distanced herself slightly from the rest of the team due to her night terrors afraid of anyone getting close to her. In the past few weeks Celeste and Reid had gotten closer, as much as she tried to avoid getting close to anyone especially the handsome and smart doctor, she couldn't help herself. She was fascinated his genius and how gorgeous he really was.</p><p>"You seem to not be sleeping lately and the last 2 days precisely, you've shown more and more symptoms of sleep deprivation".</p><p>"You know, one study, published in 2009, showed that sleep deprivation alters functional connections between the prefrontal cortex and the brain's reward- and emotion-processing centres, impairing so-called executive functions"</p><p>She rubbed your eyes hard and let out a huge sigh "I'm just having nightmares again"</p><p>"Again? What do you mean again? About what?"</p><p>"It's nothing, I'm sure they'll go soon. They always do"</p><p>"Well when you're ready to talk about it, I'm always here. You know I've suffered with nightmares before."</p><p>"I know, I just hope that your nightmares aren't like mine, I would hate to think you've been through that too".</p><p>Reid cocked his brow in confusion and let the subject go. She clearly wasn't ready to talk about it yet and he didn't want to push it more and subsequently push her away.</p><p> </p><p>————————————————-</p><p>After the briefing the team headed to the jet. They were on a particular nasty case involving serial child sex abuse. Cases involving children were particularly hard for Celeste, but the crimes involving sexual abuse hurt her more, and now both of them were combined.</p><p>In attempts to keep herself awake she was sat opposite Spencer playing a game of chess in which it seemed as though Reid was winning. Celeste was too tired to care.</p><p>"So Macchia, huh... è Italiano?" she looked up from the chest board and faced Rossi</p><p>"Si vengo dalla Massachusetts, ma sono nato in Africo. Ho vissuto lì per dieci anna prima di venire in America" she said with a smile.</p><p>The team perked up hearing the two talk in Italian, Reid couldn't help watch her lips as the words fell off her tongue. He has never heard her speak another language before, he couldn't help but stare at her in awe, transfixed by her natural Italian accent now coming out in fool force. </p><p>"I knew I recognised a little bit of the old country in you!" Rossi delighted with her answer. "But africo, now I see why you didn't mention it before"</p><p>"Where the hell is Africo?" Interjected Morgan from the other end of the jet.</p><p>"It's just a tiny city in Italy, not really that inter-</p><p>"Actually, it's one of the poorest cities in Italy"  Reid boasts, not realising it's not something Celeste wanted the team to know "it's population is roughly 3,200 and has an unemployment rate of 40 percent. gross average wage of the few who have a job is €14,000 a year. Virtually no one under the age of 30 works in Africo and one-third of the inhabitants are older than 55. Only 10 people, according to official tax returns, earn more than €40,000 a year  gross.</p><p>There are hardly any shops, not even food shops, let alone businesses or factories, although the town does notably boast a full disputation of lawyers. There is virtually no tourism either despite the unspoiled beauty of the coastline and of the blue-green Ionian Sea, and a railway line that passes through the town."</p><p>Celeste moved a chess piece with force, Reid moving one in return, she took his chess piece much to his surprise.   "Non hai capito una sega" she whispered under her breath.</p><p>Reid looked confused. Had he upset her? Was she insulting him? He knew many languages, French, Russian, Korean... but why did Italian have to be the one language he didn't know right now.</p><p>Rossi chocked on his coffee jerking forward , coffee nearly coming out of his nose<br/>
"Woah there buddy" Morgan handed him a napkin.</p><p>"What the hell did you say" JJ laughed.</p><p>"So how come you moved to Massachusetts then apart from the obvious reasons Reid so kindly pointed out" Rossi changing the subject from JJ's questions.</p><p>"My Noni and nonno knew that I wouldn't be able to live there, with me reading hundreds of books, finishing school earlier and wanting to go to college and university they decided the best thing to do was to send me to America"</p><p>"But didn't Reid say it was one of the poorest places how did you manage to do that?"  Asked Morgan.</p><p>The chess pieces moving in an intricate dance between the two. Celeste has a look of determination on her face now. Seemingly no longer tired as all her energy was focused on beating the good doctor and avoiding as many personal questions she could about her family and her childhood.</p><p>"When my mamma died, she had a bit of money saved that my dad never new about". Her face turning a shade of white and her eyes glazing over as a memory of him was brought to the forefront, she quickly shook it off and moved her bishop, happily taking one of Reid's pieces.</p><p>Reid noticed she didn't refer to her father in Italian. Strange he pondered. Maybe she didn't have a good relationship with her dad ?</p><p>A few more complex moves between the two geniuses and just like that, Reid was beaten.</p><p>Celeste must have been annoyed at his remarks about her home town and started to actually play properly. Even when tired with no sleep for 48 hours she was able to beat the mighty professor.</p><p>"Huh" Reid said as he fell back into his seat.</p><p>Celeste stuck out her tongue at Spencer. Clearly forgiving him for his rambles, but she did enjoy surprising him and whooping his ass at Chess.</p><p>God even her tongue was cute. He thought. Shaking the thought from his mind. He replied " you fancy another game? I'll actually beat you this time"</p><p>"As lovely as that may be brainbox, I think I might read my book".</p><p>JJ was sat next to Reid. "I'll have a go. I don't know how to play but I've always wanted to learn. Can you teach me Spence ? I'm losing my mind with boredom".</p><p>"Sure. But it'd be easier if you sat where Celeste was sat. It's a bit annoying playing chess with someone directly next to you".</p><p>"Celeste, do you mind if we swap? You can sit next to Spencer"</p><p>Peeking up from her book in delight , she nodded and proceed to swap seats with JJ.</p><p>"Aw don't the two eggheads look cute together" Morgan quipped , causing Rossi to laugh.</p><p>"Ha.  ha.  ha. Laugh it up dumb and dumber" she retorted.</p><p>As she sat next to Reid she couldn't help but watch his big veiny hands again devouring the small chess pieces with his vice grip. Watching the pieces go to and from started to make her sleepy. She tried to snap herself awake so she could read her book but she couldn't fight against it. She finally rested her head against her soft warm pillow and drifted off into a deep slumber. </p><p>—————</p><p>"Hey there, Sleeping Beauty", Celeste's eyes slowly began to open, the weight of her lack of sleep tugging on the bags under her eyes coaxing her to drift off again.</p><p>"Hey, hey! You can't be sleeping again, we have a case to get to little lady"</p><p>"I'm sorry, I've not been sleeping lately, I must have just passed right out.." she paused "did I talk in my sleep?"</p><p>"as a matter of fact you did, you whispered something in Italian which made Rossi laugh but he refused to tell us what you said, then 10 minutes later you called Reid Science Boy"</p><p>"Oh god" Y/N planted her face in her palm "I- I- I didn't mention the man in black did I?" sweat beaming from her brow.</p><p>"you did, but we all thought you were talking about the will smith movie" Derek let out a sympathetic smirk</p><p>"it wasn't until you started screaming and crying that we tried to wake you, even Hotch was terrified but we couldn't wake you"</p><p>"What did I say?"</p><p>A familiar voice echoed besides you " You said he's back approximately 4 times, then you screamed and kicked next to me in your sleep and shouted get off me get off me" she looked up and saw Reid, the pillow she thought she had slept on was just his ever so broad and comforting shoulders.</p><p>"Shit. Reid, I'm so sorry"</p><p>"Don't be, it was quite sweet up until the concerning part"</p><p>"What was it about anyway?" Morgan quizzed as he helped you with your bags</p><p>"I don't think I'm ready just yet"</p><p>and with that the three of them stepped off the jet in silence, agreeing to not discuss it further for Celeste's sake. </p><p>--------</p><p>It had been a few days since the team arrived. Eventually the case was cracked and the team wanted to go out to celebrate before heading back to Quantico the next day. God knows they needed it. This case had been a tough one for them all, not just Celeste. </p><p>At the hotel room, Celeste found a perfect little number to get the attention from the people in the club. She stripped from her work clothes and took a shower.</p><p>After coming out she skipped to her suitcase looking for the outfit she packed just in case the team wanted to let off some steam. </p><p>Celeste scuffed up her blue hair, put on some makeup and spritzed herself with her favourite perfume.</p><p>———</p><p>Pulling up in the Uber she noticed the muffled music and thumping, she thanked the driver and walked up the steps, flashing the bouncer her ID as she headed inside.</p><p>The music now blaring into her ear drums, her heartbeat almost seemingly beating in tune to the hums  of the bass.</p><p>Celeste walked into the club , finding the team at a table   She walked over. The team noticed her from her unforgettable blue hair. Morgan did a double take eyeing her up and nudged Reid who's drink nearly fell out of his hands. Reid choked on his drink as he stood there taking her in.</p><p>She had on fishnets, tight high wasted black shorts on, and a loose Star Wars top with random holes and rips in that was tied in a not to the side to accentuate her hourglass frame even more.</p><p>Her face fell red as she felt Reid and Morgan ogling her. </p><p>"Hey guys" she cheered.</p><p>"You look great, kiddo."</p><p>"Grazie" she said with a little curtsy , Rossi laughing making a reference to your conversation on the jet earlier that week.</p><p>"Let's party!" Shouted JJ and everyone roared. </p><p> </p><p>——---------------</p><p>Everyone was pretty drunk by now, Celeste more so than anyone as she was knocking shots back like they were water. She wanted to forget, she wanted to forget the terrors and maybe just maybe knocking back the drinks would help her sleep like a little baby later that night.</p><p>"You need to slow it down, baby girl" she nudged Morgan's shoulder, she had started to become accustomed to his pet names and sometimes threw some back his way, albeit the first time he called her it she were a little taken a back to say the least.</p><p>"Oh yeah ? I assure you agent" she tapped her finger onto his broad chest punctuating her words "Derek Morgan that I still have my wits about me, I still have game."  she hiccuped</p><p>"Game ? Oh is that a challenge" said JJ</p><p>"It might be"  Celeste replied.</p><p>"Okay then pretty lady, let's see you go up to that guy right there next to the girl and get his number."</p><p>"But she's talking to him? Isn't that kind of rude" she says.</p><p>"What? Unless you don't think you've got game" he teased.</p><p>The rest of the group roaring and pushing her to go for it , Hotch had left some time ago as everyone was getting far too drunk for his liking which she was thankful for. She didn't want her knew boss to see her in this state.</p><p>Reid's brows were furrowed, he was concerned for her. Deeply. He hadn't known her for long but it was so out of character for her to start acting this way but he didn't want to push it and press the issue, he thought it would be best if she just came to him when she was ready.</p><p>Celeste downed her final bit of liquid courage and walked towards the man and woman at the bar</p><p>She slid herself between them , turning to face the woman in front of her.<br/>
"Hey! What are you do-"</p><p>Celeste cut him off as she reached out her hand "my name is  Celeste, what's your name ?" she never usually allowed people to shake her hand, but at this point she was too far gone to notice her actions. </p><p>"Allison", she said sheepishly, giggling to herself like a little schoolgirl. </p><p>From across the room Reid jolted and said "wait , why is she talking to her?"<br/>
His eyes widening the rest of the team shocked at her boldness. His tongue darted out of his lips ever so slightly as he licked his bottom lip subconsciously, he was annoyed and as much as he didn't want to admit it, aroused. </p><p>"Er excuse me ? I was talking to her ? You cant just butt in like that."  Throwing his hands up in anger.</p><p>"Urm, yes I can ?  and I just did. Beat it before things get ugly for you."</p><p>The man threw his hands up again but sighed in defeat and walked off to go chat someone else up instead, there were plenty of other single girls in the club and he clearly didn't care too much for her anyway to put up a fight.</p><p>Roughly around 10 minutes had passed and with each moment Celeste was getting more and more bold with Allison. The team looked on transfixed. Watching her gently walk her fingers on Allison's forearm, whispering in her ear  making the girl opposite her giggle.<br/>
Celeste tucked a piece of Allison's hair behind her ear and lifted up her chin with her forefinger and thumb</p><p>After more flirting she decided to ask for her number, she wrote it down for her and she explained she'd call her sometime but that she had to go back to celebrating with her friends. Celeste gave her a kiss on her cheek. Allison blushed and waved a small goodbye as Celeste walked away blowing her a kiss and winking at her,</p><p>Walking up to the table you saw the team looking at Celeste "I bow down to you" Morgan said as he bowed his hands up and down in a worshipping movement.</p><p>"That was kinda hot" said JJ</p><p>"I told you as wasted as I may be I still got my wits about me" she threw back another drink "although I can't be too sure if I keep on drinking though.</p><p>----------------------</p><p>It was starting to get late, the team was about to go back to the hotel, but not before one final round. Celeste walked over to the bar and placed her order for the team. Just as she turned around to give them a knowing look, a man approached her from the side.</p><p>"hey there, you sexy little thing"</p><p>Celeste shuddered at the thought, the hairs on the back of her neck standing up.</p><p>"I saw you earlier with that girl, and I've been watching you dance all night, you're quite the naughty little thing aren't you?"</p><p>"I might be, but you'll never be lucky enough to know, now back the fuck off" Celeste went to walk off from the man without the drinks in hand, wanting to escape as soon as possible, she hopped the rest of the team had been watching and saw the uncomfortable interaction and would understand why she came back empty handed. As she tuned to walk away, the man grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her closer, grabbing and squeezing her ass.</p><p>"you can act like you don't want it, but I know you do. " he whispered into her ear.<br/>
without warning, Celeste turned herself around disorienting the man, dislocating the arm he grabbed her with, as he fell to the floor the building rage seeped over her as she climbed on top of him punching his face repeatedly.</p><p>As a commotion gathered by the bar, Reid and the rest of the team had already seen the initial assault from the creepy man and were on there way to walk over but Celeste's  reactions were so quick and unforgiving they didn't make it in time to stop her.</p><p>"Hey! Hey! Celeste it's okay" Reid cried as he started pull her off the creep laying below her, his face beaten and bloody.</p><p>"You crazy bitch!" the man retorted.</p><p>Celeste went to lunge for him again but was pulled back by Spencer and Morgan as she opted to spit on him instead letting out a devilish smile. </p><p>"okay, I think it's time for someone to go home now, don't you think" Celeste was still struggling against them desperately wanting to go for round two.</p><p>"Reid, why don't you take her back to the hotel, we'll speak to the guy and the staff and sort this out"</p><p>"Good idea." Reid looked down at Celeste, towering over her small but  obviously feisty frame "Come on, I'll call us an Uber" and he dragged her outside.</p><p>----------------------------------</p><p> </p><p>Trauma comes back as a reaction, not a memory - Bessel Van Der Kolk</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter? I feel as thought I should have maybe done some more chapters before this to build up the dynamic and relationships so I feel this one is a bit rushed?<br/>If i manage to think of some cases I'll edit and put them before this one so it flows easier.... stay tuned for the new chapter it'll go more into CPTSD, dissociation, trauma , abuse etc and I have a really exciting twist :0)</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Violence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter warning - flashback, dissociative episode, self harm mention, implied child abuse, childhood trauma</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You can not find piece by avoiding life - Michael Cunningham</p><p>——————————————</p><p> </p><p>It was silent. Celeste's eyes were glazed over as she stared into nothingness. Her and Spencer were now stood outside. Spencer continued to repeat himself to get her attention but she wasn't responding, she stood catatonic outside the entrance to the club continuing to stare into the street. Her body was here but her mind was not. </p><p>"Celeste, are you okay?" nothing. "Celeste? talk to me" nothing.</p><p>As the rest of the team eventually stumbled outside they approached Spencer and Celeste. <br/>"Hey, how is she?" Morgan said quitely.</p><p>"She's not talking, I don't know what's wrong" Spencer replied, the pitch in his voice rising slightly as he was trying to compose himself. </p><p>"She might just be in shock, someone did just assault her" JJ replied, glancing over to Celeste's still form with a sympathetic caring look only a mother would give. </p><p>"Maybe you're right, I'm just concerned, she hasn't been acting like herself lately" replied Spencer. </p><p>"Yeah, but how long have we known her? Two weeks? We haven't been around her that much to know what 'herself' really is" Morgan said bluntly earning a death stare from JJ. </p><p>Spencer and the team walked slowly to Celeste, who was still stood in the middle of the pavement, eyes glazed over as if they were somewhere else, witnessing something that shouldn't be witnessed. </p><p>Spencer reached out to touch Celeste's shoulders "hey, Celeste , are you o-" his first mistake. </p><p>Instead of using her quick self defence reactions she fell to the floor covering her ears, rocking back and forth and pulling parts of her hair out </p><p>"Get off me! Get off me! Get off me! Get off me!" She chanted over and over again as if it was her mantra. </p><p>Spencer fell back, the others wide eyed in shock.</p><p>"What the fuck was that?" Morgan shouted. </p><p>"I think she may be dissociating" Rossi chimed in. </p><p>Spencer rushed over to her again, this time she was punching the side of her head "I don't want to, I don't want to" she chanted another haunting mantra. </p><p>"Hey- hey Celeste it's me Spencer" he cooed softly as he crouched in front of her paying special attention not to touch her this time. </p><p>"You're one of them, please don't touch me, I'm so tired. Please don't touch me please don't tell my dad that I couldn't , please don't tell him, he'll punish me again I don't want to go back in the dark room" </p><p>"Celeste, you're safe, you're with your friends and we were just inside partying. You remember right ? No one here is going to hurt you." </p><p>Celeste's glazed over distant eyes looked down towards Spencer's crouching form, and he took a chance, his second mistake, inching just a tiny bit  closer to her on the floor. Celeste recoiled as if Spencer was about to attack her and she trembled her hands shaking. Her sleeves slightly rolled up as she began scratching at her forearms as she rocked back and forth; with her sleeves ever so slightly rolled up he noticed an array of purple and white scars etched across her wrist and his eyes slightly teared up. </p><p>What happened to her that was so severe she turned into a trembling mess before him?</p><p>Her eyes suddenly shut as she winced, and then they popped open again, her breathing slowing down, her eyes darting around between Spencer's form and the images from the street behind him. "W-who are you? What did you do to me" she cried. </p><p>"It's me Spencer ? Don't you remember? We came here to celebrate. You work at the FBI, you remember that don't you ? You're having a dissociative episode brought on from what I think was flashback of a traumatic event" </p><p>"I-I-I am?" </p><p>The team looked like they were edging forward to check it Celeste was okay, Spencer shushed them away mouthing that they should go home and he would take it from here. They nodded and began to leave, catching a taxi on the other street to avoid overwhelming Celeste who was still on the ground crying. </p><p>"Yes, you work at the FBI in the behavioural analysis unit, here, this may help to ground you" he reached into his pocket where he still had his FBI badge; he never liked to leave without it just in case, he was thankful that he kept it with him tonight for Celeste's sake. "This is my FBI badge, yours is at our hotel, I want you to hold onto this and focus on it. Can you do that for me?" </p><p>"Uh-huh" she slowly took the badge from his hands, wincing slightly as her fingers almost touched his. She began to focus on the badge stroking it. </p><p>After a minute or two she began to calm down even further, she zoned out into the distance, staring past the badge and seemingly returned back to reality. </p><p>"S-s-spencer.. what am I doing out here?" She looked across to him where he was sat on the floor in front of her with his legs crossed "did I have too much to drink and pass out?" </p><p>"You don't remember?"</p><p>"No? What happened" she started to sob. </p><p>"Hey hey - calm down its okay I'm here now. Are you okay to stand up? I'll get us a cab and we can go back to the hotel and we can talk about what happened"</p><p>"Okay" she agreed sheepishly staring down at the floor sniffling. </p><p>———————————————</p><p>"I-I-I'm sorry for how I acted in the club" she blurted out as she sat on Spencer's bed in his hotel room. </p><p>"Do you remember now" he replied as he slowly took a seat at the table in the corner of the room. He wanted to sit next to her and hug her but he knew being in close proximity to her would overwhelm her. </p><p>"I remember the man touching me and me attacking him - I'm so sorry" </p><p>"You don't need to be sorry. He assaulted you. Maybe your reaction was a bit excessive but you couldn't help it, it seemed like you were dissociating then as well" </p><p>"Yeah" Celeste said softly as she touched her forearms and winced at the pain, noticing the now red raw claw marks down her arm that were slightly scabbed with blood. </p><p>"I know you probably don't want to talk about it" he began attempting to ignore the glaring scars on her  arm that he noticed outside the club earlier that night " but we need to. The whole team witnessed it and we'll have to explain to them and report it to Hotch. You'll probably need some time off" </p><p>Celeste let out a giant sigh and smiled at him softly, the pain in her eyes beaming through to him. His heart aches for her. She was broken and he wanted to fix her so badly that it pained him more than anything to see her so damaged both mentally and physically. He wanted to hurt whoever or whatever did this to her. </p><p>"My - my - my dad....he he use to beat me everyday" </p><p>"It's okay" he gently walked over to her and sat on the edge of the bed "you're safe here". </p><p>"He-he had these clients. He was apart of a gang, an organisation, the mafia whatever you want to call it. The city is so poor there that that's all you can do really , and he was quite feared. He would be mad at me  and my mother everyday for any reason he could find, but the worse of it is when he would let his customers - his clients take me into a room and and" Celeste broke down sobbing scratching her firearms again</p><p>"Hey hey stop that" he grabbed her hands and knelt in front of her, looking up at her with his hypnotic hazel eyes "please stop hurting yourself". </p><p>"Did he let those men touch you" he paused not really wanting to know the answer "inappropriately?"</p><p>She nodded her head through her tears "people would pay him to let them ... you know? God I don't like saying it out loud"</p><p>"My mamma finally stood up to him even though she was so scared but she couldn't stand what was happening to me anymore and she tried to take me away but my dad , he he knew and he oh god" Celeste began sobbing into her hands and shaking "he killed her infront of me and her then beat me so bad I was so scared he told me it was all my fault my mum died" </p><p>"Celeste..you know it's not your fault right? He did this to you, he killed your mum. That's never your fault"</p><p>She ignored his statement, she still believed deep down that it was all her fault "I managed to run away and escape and and a nice old couple found me in the neighbouring village and took me in, they were like grandparents to me. They kept me hidden and eventually with enough money saved they sent me away so I could be safe. I went and lived in foster care whilst in school, I got a new name and a new identity so he could never find me" </p><p>"What is your real name?"</p><p>"Bianca Romano" </p><p>The corners of Spencer's mouth turned upwards to form a gentle smile as he gazed into her eyes. "That's a beautiful name"</p><p>She tucked a piece of lonely hair behind her ear "thank you" she laughed softly " I picked the name Celeste because it meant heavenly and my mum would always call me her Angel and I thought it fit well, Macchia was just a random Italian last name" she started laughing more. </p><p>"You know, I really love the name Bianca, it suits you more" </p><p>"Can you tell the team for me? Maybe not go into detail and maybe not tell Hotch. I'm okay to carry on working I really am." She looked up at Spencer slowly , meeting his hazel eyes "can I stay here tonight? I don't want to be alone" </p><p>"Of course you can, get some rest". </p><p>"Will you sleep in the bed with me?" She replied innocently </p><p>"Is that what you want?" </p><p>"Yes" </p><p>"Then yes I will" and with that both Spencer and Bianca got into bed. Spencer didn't sleep until Bianca had fully dozed off as he wanted to watch over her and make sure she was safe. Eventually she drifted off and in her sleep cuddled into Spencer's chest. As he lay upright on the bed looking down at her smiling and stroking her hair he eventually drifted off too. </p><p>————————————-</p><p>Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls. The most massive characters are seared with scars. - Khalil Gibran</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello my furry little friends; I haven’t spellchecked this or checked it for discrepancies to the story in anyway as I just rushed it out in the last 20 minutes  I shall check it tomorrow and update where I can  :0)</p>
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